Ok, maybe my headline is a little over the top, but I know we all have a love hate relationship with our doctors. Like it or not, they are the ultimate bearers of bad news. More than likely they will be the ones who tell us we are going to die someday. My purpose is to get you to divert your attention to this important message; we should focus our lives on living, not on dying.
A visit to my doctor
As our society recommends, I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. While he poked around with his cold stethoscope listening to my heart, he informed me he could hear a heart murmur.
Other doctors in the past had informed me that my heart skips a beat now and again (sort of like how I skip beats in salsa dancing), but I could not remember being told before that I had a murmur. When I stated this was the first time this had shown up in a physical, my doctor looked worried and ordered his assistant to schedule an echogram of my heart ASAP.
Listening to bad health news really sucks
Seeing a worried look on your doctor’s face is not a pleasant experience. These are the times my personality’s problem-solving side takes over and attempts to understand the problem so I can solve it. I did what others normally do under the circumstances; I googled my aforementioned diagnosis in search of useful information. My investigation netted a very unsatisfying range of answers; a heart murmur could be anything from an innocent noise your heart makes pumping blood to a harbinger of my coming death. BTW, I don’t know why it is that every time I google some medical problem I am having, the Google gods tell me I can die from it. But I digress!
All my efforts to get information ended up fanning my fears which, in turn, caused me to spend an uncomfortable night wondering what precautions I should take. Should I stop all extraneous activities like tennis and weight lifting? Do I need to more closely monitor my heart rate and eliminate any activities that cause anxiety (like dating)? Do I need to update my will?
Fear has no value
When the early rays of sunshine peeked under my window shade that next morning, I had already bucked my fearful trend.
I know am not a young pup anymore, but that doesn’t have to stop me from living a full and physically active life. I have a great life; I am not changing it one iota over this diagnosis. Denying myself the things that give me joy and fun because they may hasten my end is my idea of death itself.
As Prentice Mulford states in his book, Thoughts Are Things;
“When we live in fear of any ill, or expect ill fortune, we also make a construction of unseen element, which, by the same law of attraction, draws to you destructive, damaging forces or elements.”
Death is a natural part of life; I don’t fear it, for I know that my physical end will lead to a new beginning. If I drop dead from continuing to be active, then I know that is how I was supposed to end. I will not live fearing any illness.
My phone will probably ring off the hook (this is really an old expression) from family and friends wondering if there is a reason for their concern. There is not, my echocardiogram showed no abnormality. Many people live with heart murmurs. What is more important is that my mind, body and spirit are wonderful, we are working together to explore, learn and evolve. I am positive I have a long run left, there are too many things yet for me to do and greater good to help create. I will live as I am, for I need to stay fit, strong, open-minded, spiritually focused and youthful in spirit so I can do the things I need to do and help those I am supposed to help.
What to do about medical advice
I am not advocating that one stop going to doctors and listening to their advice; they have a purpose. But, in today’s environment, you need to consult a doctor who will encourage you to live fully, not one who scares you into dying. Use your instincts to determine what is ultimately right for you. I trust my doctor in this case, and I scheduled the procedure he suggested. If he thinks there is something I need to do further, I will follow his advice as long as it concurs with my instinctual knowledge.
When my end comes, some might say that I should have listened to my doctor more. But guess what? There is no way of knowing our end date, the only certainty we have is that we are all going to die at some point.
Heart problems or not, I will live as I am and stop worrying about what might kill me. Living in fear is not living.
Remember, paying gratitude for your life forward will bring joy much joy and contentment.